Infidelity FAQ

 

Is what you notice a sign of infidelity or just a change in behavior? If you suspect your partner is having an affair, unfortunately, you are most probably right.   Most people ask: What is a sure sign of infidelity?  Of course, there is no simple answer.  Chances are you will most probably notice a string of coincidences or changes in behavior.  But deep down you know in yourself that things just aren’t right.  There are lots of little things you may notice.  For instance, your intimacy with your partner leaves a lot to be desired.  They are also most likely to be short with you or closed about anything you ask them – not offering much detail.  The reason for that could be because they have other things on their mind or they are being careful not to let anything slip out.  Often they may be feeling guilty or just simply thinking about being somewhere else.  

Other signs of an affair can be out of character trips or longer working days.  Have they changed how they dress?  Or do they go to work smelling of new cologne?  Credit cards can give some clues as usually there are some tell tale unusual purchases – and these maybe explained away – remember they may be legitimate or they may have already thought up a plausible alibi.  The best way to prove either way is to have your partner shadowed from a distance and secure some video footage of where they have been and who they are meeting up with.  The results will give you peace of mind and a set of facts from which you can make decisions going forward.  Don’t blow your relationship on what you think is a sign of infidelity – get the peace of mind only the truth can give you.

About Domestic surveillance?

Surveillance is the method used to discover if spouses are cheating on each other. It can involve husbands, wives, boyfriends or girlfriends. Also, referred to as "tailing someone" it is the technique of putting an investigator out in the field who follows the suspected cheater to document their activities without their knowledge. This is accomplished by recording their activities on videotape.

I'm embarrassed about even talking to someone about this.

We regularly get calls from people who suspect their spouse or significant others of infidelity. It is nothing to be embarrassed about. What you are seeking is peace of mind about something you are not sure of. It is natural to seek to determine if your suspicions are real or imagined. We invest a tremendous part of ourselves in relationships. It is natural to want to determine the strength and integrity of that relationship. 

What if I am wrong?

If there is no evidence the subject is cheating, you will have gained peace of mind about your relationship. Since our investigations are 100% confidential, you will not have risked sacrificing the relationship if you are wrong.

Is domestic surveillance legal?

Surveillance is the process of documenting what is going on in the world of an individual. As long as we stay with in the law while conducting out investigation (i.e. not trespassing, etc.), surveillance by a licensed detective is completely legal.

What are the fees charged for domestic surveillance?

Surveillance is billed on an hourly basis plus a mileage charge. Rates are dependant on where the surveillance will take place. As a general rule, in remote areas, the rates are a bit higher. Before the case is started, a strategy is established depending on the circumstances and your needs. Once this plan is in place a budget can be established. Investigation services are payable in advance of the work being conducted. Payments can be made by credit card (over the phone if you wish), or by case, check or money order.

How is the surveillance plan established?

Planning is often more important than execution. The better job we do of designing the surveillance, the more likely it is to be productive and the more cost effective it will be. Because you know more about your spouses behavior than we ever will, we rely on you to assist us in developing the correct time and place to watch them. We need you to determine when they are most likely to be engaged in this behavior and where we should start the surveillance. If you are not able to discern when with any degree or accuracy, we recommend that you consider when they are not available and we can eliminate those times as a starting point. All these questions and more go into creating an effective surveillance strategy.  

How many investigators are used on a domestic surveillance case?

The number of agents used depends on a number of factors. Basic surveillance on an individual being followed from home or an uncomplicated work situation can be conducted by one agent. More complicated scenarios, such as following someone from a high rise office building , or airport or hotel require an additional agent. Other factors in which we may recommend a second agent include fast and aggressive drivers and extra alert drivers who always watch the rear view mirror. Of course an additional agent increases the cost of surveillance, and this factor is also taken into consideration in arriving at your budget. For a proper frame of reference, consider the fact that no law enforcement agency would ever conduct surveillance with less than two cars and few do that. The more investigators, the less likely the chance of detection.

What do I do once the spousal surveillance is set up?

Once the surveillance plan is in place it is important that you do not do anything to alert the subject of the investigation. Do not change your habits and do not ask too many questions about their activities. 

Will the suspected cheating spouse find out that they are being watched?

Our surveillance investigations are 100% confidential. We do everything necessary to insure the covert nature of the investigation. If we ever perceive that the security of the investigation is threatened, we back off and re-evaluate with your input. One important point: Never threaten to hire an investigator. This will make the suspected cheater even more difficult to watch. If you have done this, be sure to tell us ahead of time so we can prepare.

What evidence will I receive at the conclusion?

The evidence collected in domestic surveillance consists of the videotape of the activities and a surveillance report which details all the activity in writing. Both are submitted to you, or if you whish we can maintain them for you.

 

Signs of Spousal Infidelity – Giving you the peace of mind and help you need to move forward or to rebuild your relationship.

 

Statistics say that 85% of women who feel their lover is cheating are correct and 50% of men who feel their lover is cheating are right. If you have suspicious, warnings or signals of infidelity by your spouse or partner, consider some of the following and be as impartial as possible.

 

 

Have you noticed a change in your partner’s activities?

Working a lot of over time: Your partner claims they need stay late for a meeting when they are really meeting with the lover.

Unexplained Finances: Cheating spouse has more cash on hand without accountability or has unexplained receipts in wallet or purse and unexplained payments on bank statements. You may also want to consider reviewing your spouse’s credit card bills for signs of a cheating spouse.

Unexplained Activities: Cheating spouse asks about your schedule more often than usual. Spouse’s clothes smell of perfume or cologne. Spouse gets his/her laundry done independently. Mileage on car is high yet he/she reports only short distance errands..

No longer interested in sex: As years go by, many partners experience changes in their sexual activity. However, if your spouse completely eliminates sex from your relationship then you should consider that there is a possible affair going on.

New sexual techniques: Over the years you and your partner always had sex a particular way and now your partner comes home with new sexual moves that they learned from being with someone else. 

Saying “I need my space”: Perhaps your marriage is on the rocks and your partner tells you that he/she needs space. This could be a way for him/her to move to the next stage; separation.

Unexplained use of cell phone: Hiding the phone bill: This is #1 way to find who the lover is. If your partner is hiding the bill and won’t let you see it, then obviously there is something on there that they don’t want you to see. Cell phone bills contain calls with long duration, now has a phone card but never used on before has suspicious voice-mail messages, phone calls from you are not returned in a timely fashion. Spouse leaves house or goes to other rooms to talk on the telephone.

Unaccountable Hours: Your partner is not able to explain the reason why they have not been where they say they have been. Cheating husband or wife is often “unavailable” at work. This is the time frame to schedule surveillance.

Getting hang-up phone calls: The lover wants to speak with your spouse…maybe they had a spat. Calling you is a way to make you aware that there is an affair going on.

Excessive use of the internet: The internet has become a dating tool for both men and women to meet others. It has become a way for people to explore their sexuality in private. Also, unexplained use of the internet suddenly deleting e-mails messages, using new or free e-mail accounts, web browser history list contains unusual sites (this is a record of web sites visited), uses the computer alone and secretly.

Not wearing a wedding ring: If your spouse no longer wears their wedding ring that is an indication that they want everyone to know that they are single/unhappy.